Your Wildest Limo Experience

      I met the band at the airport, loaded up their equipment and headed straight to the club. I didn’t know it at the time but a small number of clients are allowed to smoke in the cars. The guy was polite and asked if he could which, being new of course, I flatly refused. Ah well. He was the singer anyway so it was good he had a chauffeur he didn’t know looking after his health.

      When we pulled in front of the club the drummer bellowed, ‘we’re playing this dump hole again?’ To which the singer moaned, ‘This place freaking sucks.’ Indeed, there’s nothing quite as glamorous as embarking on a world ‘bar’ tour.

      While they set up and dialed in their sound check I went and bought a burrito. Thought I’d go for a quick meal rock’n’roll style.

      Since I was taking them to the airport after the show, I arrived early to check them out. I couldn’t believe it. I thought they sucked like they thought the venue sucked. That was some big time pain. I checked the address to make sure I was in the right place. No doubt about it, I was.

      The load out went smoothly and two fans showed up to get autographs.

Hottest limo stories?

 

Everyone climbed into the van and that post-gig energy kept the band in a state of euphoria. That buzz however, soon turned into cacophony when one of the guys cranked up some disco on the radio. Guess he hadn’t had enough bad, loud music for one night. Then the singer dropped a small nuke and declared it was time for his ‘cool down’ exercises. The moment they each secretly dreaded had come to pass yet again. Any kind of ‘party’ that was happening stopped then and there. An audible ‘ugh’ assailed the heavens and the pulsating energy that was, was quickly sucked out of the van. With his ‘cool down’ exercises boring full steam ahead, the singer sounded like a tranquilized elephant. The poor band didn’t stand a chance. As he was the singer, and his vocal chords were like precious gold, abject pain ensued.

      We rolled up to the airport. I was blown away that they actually had someone to greet them and schlep their gear. Who were these guys?

      Back at headquarters I checked them out on Google. Turns out they were due to play a major festival in Canada and they had even written a hit song for a major motion picture. It’s a mad, mad world this business of rock’n’roll- from a sweaty dump with two fans to sixty thousand devotees the following day.

      The verdict is still out but when they tipped me $20 I decided there has to be something good about their music. I’m still looking but sometime, somewhere, I’m finally gonna’ see the light. When that happens I guess I’ll be as happy as can be, just like those two fans outside the club.